Up at 6am, rushes out, drives an hour in traffic and works for 10 hours a day. Drives for two hours to get home, slops on the couch and watches TV until he falls asleep, every day of his life. Perhaps the most predictable picture of a common man. The question worth asking, is the picture happy enough? Or a stereotypical shadow to which every male must conform?
Spoilt brats or caught off-guard?
It will not be wrong to say that Indian men are an “overly-privileged” lot – heralded as superior by the Indian society, spoilt silly by their mothers at home, and even exalted to “devta” by “patnis”. Now who wouldn’t nurture false egos at this? But now suddenly, a rising breed of superwomen, are threatening to topple them off their thrones. Caught off guard just when they were nestling into their comfort zone, a whole generation of men are being forced to question the way they have lived so far; and are being forced to introspect.
Finding the real person behind the man
A quick look gives us an idea of the dots they’re expected to connect:
- The son must take care of his parents
- The husband must become the bread winner in an expensive world, or must stand up to his extremely successful wife
- The father must be the care taker, protector, bread-winner and now increasingly, a coach – the pillar of strength
- Add to it the societal pressure of performing well and of proving himself ‘out there’ in the world as a professional
- Strong peer pressure to maintain a lifestyle like the othe
Plus the life lessons that parents unwittingly pass on to sons: “Boys don’t cry”, “Be the strong one”, “You cannot break.” What they see of their fathers and father-figures, they imbibe naturally. Their personality and thoughts evolve around these axial learning, and men become trained to live that as their reality
In the process, the pressure of being on top of their game is paramount. Hobbies, relaxation, “me” time are long buried and forgotten. But one little nudge can bring the fortress crashing down – the reason often unknown or beyond comprehension.
It’s alright for men to share what they feel
A different kind of man is challenging this age-old definition of a man. He is dropping the garb of toughness and is embracing his true strength. He is not any different from the traditional man – in fact he is only uncovering the most “real” face of the man, which has always existed but has never been celebrated. He is part of a whole generation of men who:
- Choose not to hide their emotions, vulnerability, fears and fatigue
- Own up to their true nature and show their real side
- Understand that feelings do not make them weak
- Are conscious in “reality” and are more in touch with their inner self
- Are not afraid of having women as their equals
- Are fine with embracing their sexuality
- Can let go of those patterns and beliefs that no longer serve them
- Can establish true relationships with authenticity and integrity
Men are opening up to spirituality without feeling odd about it
This new breed of men understands that spirituality is not about becoming esoteric. Rather it is about making the most of life as it is in this given moment. They are open to possibilities like never before. They look forward to rediscover and reconnect with the power of nature, mystery and the universe.
Life coaching sessions for men celebrate these frontrunners of change within the comfort and assurance of confidentiality. In a private and confidential setting, men can drop their inhibitions and run forth with their real selves, into a conscious new dawn. I believe that these men are embarking on a life-long journey of spiritual consciousness in order to transform themselves, and through these journeys, their relationships, families, workplaces, communities and our environment. I wish them all the best!
About Veechi Shahi
Veechi Shahi is an exuberant, joyous and deeply-connected life and wellness coach who believes in the wonder of life. She offers Life and Wellness Coaching, Stress Management, Women Empowerment Workshops and meditation to support individuals, groups, institutes and corporates. Strengthened by her rich experience of 17 years, she honours the individuality of each person and undertakes inward journeys with them, to go beyond conditioning and bring out their finest.